The 6th Ever 1999 Annual Outhouse Races
in Trenary, Michigan


Welcome to Trenary Home of the 6th Ever Outhouse Races Photo by J. Loose

The Outhouses That Received Awards
People's Choice - Hockeytown	Most Miles Traveled - Windy Shitty
Most Humorous - The Vati-Can	Best Workmanship - Operating Engineers
Best Presentation - Tasson Distributing	Best Use of Theme - Gibby Bar
Race Results and Times
Kids Category
1st Place - Seymours Porta-Potty: 12.75 Seconds
2nd Place - Purple Potty: 16.57 Seconds
3rd Place - Dickenshield Insurance: 17.53 Seconds
Adults Category
Ages 13 - 30	Ages 31 and Over
1st Place - Peoples State Bank: 20.19 Seconds	1st Place - Timber Products: 24.235 Seconds
2nd Place - Pats Corner Bar: 24.25 Seconds	2nd Place - Chums: 25.0 Seconds
3rd Place - Kurt's Place: 24.3 Seconds	3rd Place - Trenary Fire Dept.: 30.662 Seconds
	There was controversy over 3rd place. People were claiming that the "Pushers" were under 31!

	On the way to Trenary, Michigan, you must cross the Mackinac Bridge. It is a suspension bridge and is 5 miles long. Notice the ice in the Straits of Mackinac.
Mackinac Bridge Photo by J. Loose
See the next picture for an explanation of this lighthouse.
	Mackinac Bridge Lighthouse Photo by J. Loose
	This sign explains the Lighthouse.
Lighthouse Sign Photo by J. Loose
Drive North 19 miles from Gladstone, Michigan, and you'll see this sign.
	Exit Here for the Races Photo by J. Loose
	You're getting closer. We turn here and then you are very close...
You're almost there... Photo by J. Loose
When was the last time you saw a sign... ...for Outhouse parking?
	Outhouse Parking This Side of Street! Photo by J. Loose
	As you come into town from the North, you will see these two landmarks on your left. Much time was spent here celebrating the trip up. Return to the Race description below...
Trenary's Entertainment District Photo by J. Loose
Toivo Aho - Chairman of the Outhouse Race Committee. Return to the Race descriptions below...
	Toivo Aho - Chairman of the Outhouse Race Committee Photo by J. Loose
	The Official Outhouse Classic Jacket
The Official Outhouse Classic Jacket Photo by J. Loose
Patty the Painter is the person who invited me to attend the races this year. If it wasn't for her, I never would have made it. So you can thank Patty for this web page. As for Rollie, you couldn't meet a nicer person. He and Toivo and all the other members of the committee did a bang up job with this year's Outhouse Races. Return to the Race description below...
	Patty the Painter and Rollie Photo by J. Loose
	This is one of the trophies which were given out. The trophies were hand made especially for the event.
Outside view of the 1999 Outhouse Classic Trophy Photo by J. Loose
This is the inside of the trophy. As you can see, everything is authentic.
	Inside the Outhouse Classic Trophy Photo by J. Loose
	This is what you receive when you go to the Outhouse Classic Races. Pretty Cool isn't it?
Official 6th Ever Outhouse Classic Program Photo by J. Loose
Man, they sold buttons, headbands, cups, Tshirts, Sweatshirts and Ball Caps. Just about anything you'd want, they had for ya.
	Official Outhouse Classic Button Photo by J. Loose
	This is a view looking down Main Street of Trenary, MI just prior to the racing. The bars are in the background and you are looking at the finish line off in the distance.
Main Street just prior to the Races Photo by J. Loose
This is another shot of the crowd waiting for the start of the races.
	Main St. Crowd Photo by J. Loose
	This is a shot looking towards the starting line. In the distance you can see the outhouses lined up waiting to start.
Outhouse Race Fans Photo by J. Loose
Best Workmanship Award This was by far one of the best entries. The designer and builder was Patty the Painter. She always comes up with one of the best entries each year. Return to the Awards Section
	Operating Engineers Cat' Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	Best Workmanship Award Look closely and you'll see the outhouse at the rear of the Cat'. See? It was Union Built! Return to the Awards Section
Rear view showing the potty Photo by J. Loose
Best Workmanship Award Another frontal view with other entries in the background. Return to the Awards Section
	Another view of the Operating Engineer's Entry Photo by J. Loose
	People's Choice Award This outhouse came all the way from Dearborn Heights, Michigan. Return to the Awards Section
Hockeytown Photo by J. Loose
People's Choice Award This entry was pretty cool in that they had a replica of the Stanley Cup mounted on top. Return to the Awards Section
	Hockeytown Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	Most Humorous Award My personal favorite, the Vati-Can by far was the most humorous in my opinion too. Return to the Awards Section Return to the race descripton below...
Nuns pushing the Vati-Can Photo by J. Loose
Most Humorous Award This one was funny. As the nuns pushed it down Main St., they prayed. Take special notice of the 10 Commandments shown below: 1. Thou shalt not Leave the Seat UP! 2. Thou shalt not Tip over thy neighbors outhouse. 3. Thou shalt Lime once a year. 4. Thou shalt Spray. 5. Thou shalt not Sprinkle on the seat. 6. Thou shalt not Leave tracks in your drawers! 7. Thou shalt not be a Party "Poper"! 8. Thou shalt not let a sacred fart. 9. Thou shalt not take your farts in vain. 10. Thou shalt honor the Popie LePew. Return to the Awards Section
	Nuns on the Run Photo by J. Loose
	Most Humorous Award This shows the inside of the Vati-Can. I'm not sure what that was inside but it was someone on the potty! Return to the Awards Section
Inside the Vati-Can Photo by J. Loose
Hey, what can I say. I liked this one. This outhouse had some hand painted art on it.
	This was the Six Pack S_IT Shack. Photo by J. Loose
	This was a spin off of the Bud frogs in the swamp. Only these frogs are happy being in TRE-NA-RY!
TRE_NA_RY said the Three Frogs Photo by J. Loose
Most Miles Traveled This entry came all the way from New Mexico, I think. The buildings swayed back and forth while it was being pushed down Main Street. I think I saw it burning in a barrel after the race. Evidently the owners didn't want to carry it all the way back to New Mexico! Return to the Awards Section
	The Windy Shitty Photo by J. Loose
	Here we see quite a few Outhouses waiting for the start of the Races. The weather was a bit foggy all day and we experienced all kinds of precipitation during the event. Return to the Awards Section
Windy Shitty waiting for the start Photo by J. Loose
Most Miles Traveled This was what you saw when you looked inside the Windy Shitty Outhouse. Return to the Awards Section
	Inside the Windy Shitty Photo by J. Loose
	This Outhouse got my vote as one of the best. The builders of it are shown here. They were very friendly.
Front of the Flower Power Car-Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
Here you can see what the back of the Flower Power Car Outhouse looked like. Great work and time went into this one.
	Back of the Flower Power Car Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	Check this photo out closely. The seats are...the outhouse seats. The mirror has the toilet paper and the suitcases are in the back and ready to go!
Inside the Flower Power Car Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
This one was light-weight and was very fast. I'm not sure I would use it, though.
	A Superior Extrusion See-through Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	On the back of the Superior Extrusion Outhouse was a bright red warning which read "DANGER EXPLOSIVE VAPOR NO SMOKING NO OPEN FLAMES NO SPARKS"
Danger - Explosive Vapor Around! Photo by J. Loose
This was another one of my favorites. The whole thing was designed like a solar system with the Outhouse Hole being called "The Black Hole"! The seat was a half moon and very original. As this one was being pushed down Main Street, the Planet Earth fell out of its holder onto The Black Hole...Very Funny!
	Planet Trenary and The Black Hole Photo by J. Loose
	1st Place Ages 13-30 in 20.19 Seconds This Outhouse was not only the fastest, but I think one of the best ideas. Return to the Awards Section
Peoples State Bank Outhouse 24-hr Banking Machine Photo by J. Loose
1st Place Ages 13-30 in 20.19 Seconds Ok. Your choices at the People's State Bank Outhouse Machine are the following: Press 1 for Liquids Press 2 for Solids Press 3 if not sure Press 4 if you want to start over. Return to the Awards Section
	Choices at the Bank's Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	1st Place Ages 13-30 in 20.19 Seconds In this photo, take a close look at the receipt coming out of the money machine. I sure hope it isn't "used"! Your choices at the People's State Bank Outhouse Machine are the following: Press 1 for Liquids Press 2 for Solids Press 3 if not sure Press 4 if you want to start over. Return to the Awards Section
Better Closeup of choices Photo by J. Loose
1st Place Ages 13-30 in 20.19 Seconds Here's the inside of the Money Machine Outhouse. Notice the Money wallpaper and the toilet paper, er, receipt paper! Return to the Awards Section
	Inside the Money Machine Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	3rd Place Ages 13-30 in 24.3 Seconds I take it this one came from Wisconsin where in 1999, the Wisconsin Badgers won the Rose Bowl out in Pasadena, CA. In Boston, they would think this one was a Rose Bowl Party! Return to the Awards Section
Kurt's Place - A Rose Bowl Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
3rd Place Ages 13-30 in 24.3 Seconds This entry was a bit illegal since I'm not sure it had a door to open and an outhouse hole inside. Return to the Awards Section
	Back of the Rose Bowl Potty Photo by J. Loose
	1st Place Ages 31+ in 24.235 Seconds This company "Timber Products" always comes up with a top notch entry each year. This time they applied wood veneer to the entire outside of the outhouse. It was a sight to behold! Return to the Awards Section
A Wood Veneered Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
1st Place Ages 31+ in 24.235 Seconds This is the inside of the Wood Veneered Outhouse. I like it! Return to the Awards Section
	Inside of the Wood Veneered Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	3rd Place Ages 31+ in 30.662 Seconds There was a bit of controversy with this 3rd place finish. Someone claimed one or more runners were under 31 and they waited until almost the end to race after the under 31 category was finished. It is a neat design though. Return to the Awards Section
Mathias Twp. Fire Department Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
This entry was created by The Grove Restaurant. Here we see them finishing construction. This was kind of neat the way it was designed with the big hamburger on the roof.
	The Grove Restaurant Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	This is a view of the front and inside of the Grove Outhouse. It was pretty funny to see it racing because the person inside was bouncing around and looked like it would pop out the front at any time!
Front View of The Grove Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
This was kind of different. Instead of being enclosed, the sitting area was exposed and shaped like a toilet. When a bunch of us raised up the toilet lid, we discovered some S_IT still stuck to the seat!!! Everyone got a good laugh out of it.
	Scandia Organics Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	Jason's Poop Pusher was kind of aerodynamically designed. The front was in the shape of a wedge but the back was exposed. This meant anyone using the outhouse would be in view of the pushers.
Jason Poop Pusher Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
Look out South Park. Here comes the Outhouse of your dreams.
	Perkins Park Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	The Silver Streak Outhouse is in the foreground and Jim's John is in the background.
Silver Streak Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
Hmmmm. This outhouse was a bit questionable since it was made out of plastic with a door painted on the front. I don't think there was a working outhouse hole inside or not.
	Matekel Lake Lodge Race Team Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	ABATE is a group that wants the right to decide whether to wear helmets or not. They enter the race every year I'm told.
Even ABATE has an Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
Need service on your auto? Come to Len's Service. They even have an outhouse at your disposal!
	Len's Service Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	These guys had to finish construction after they arrived. The front had fresh deer horns and the back had fresh legs off a deer. It looked like it was REAL fresh...While they were working, the battery wore out on the drill they were using so they had to finish with screwdrivers.
Finishing touches on Buck's Head Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
Here's a couple outhouses waiting to begin the race. The Silver Dollar Bar creation is on the left.
	Silver Dollar Bar & 6-Pack Outhouses Photo by J. Loose
	Jim's John had hand painted markings but also had the push bars in front. To be correct, according to the rules, the push bars should be at the back.
Jim's John Photo by J. Loose
This company must be a sawing company or saw mill. Notice the blood dripping from the teeth of the blade!
	Takalo's Outhouse Photo by J. Loose
	This one took the cake! The last Outhouse to race, here came Monika Lewinsky and Linda Tripp pushing the "White House" complete with President Clinton inside. Not only that, but Monika wore a blue dress with prominent white stains on the front and Clinton sat on the pot with his "you know what" exposed. Needless to say, everyone there just roared with laughter. Return to the Race description below...
The White House with Monika Lewinsky and President Clinton Photo by J. Loose
Here you can see the starting line and about three kids outhouses ready to race. the race starter is on the right side holding the orange flag.
	Photo by J. Loose
	1st Place - Kids 12.75 Seconds This was the first place Outhouse in the Kids races. It was kind of creative but not as good as one of the kids outhouses. Unfortunately, I didn't get good pictures of all of the kids outhouses. Return to the Awards Section
Seymour Potty-Potty Photo by J. Loose

GOTTA GO!
GOTTA GO!

TO THE 6TH EVER OUTHOUSE CLASSIC
ONLY IN TRENARY, MICHIGAN!

  What is the Outhouse Classic? Build an outhouse with wood and/or cardboard, put in a toilet seat & roll of toilet paper, mount it on skis and PUSH it 500 feet to WIN! They even give an Outhouse Classic Tshirt with every paid entry (2 pushers per entry).
  Where is The Outhouse Classic held? Trenary, Michigan
  When is the Outhouse Classic held? The last weekend of February.
  How do I get there from here? In Michigan, drive North on I-75 to Mackinac City, MI. Cross the Mackinac Bridge to St. Ignace and head West on Route 2. Eventually you come to Gladstone, MI. From there, head North for about 19 Miles and watch for the signs to the Outhouse Classic! Nearest Airport is Escanaba, MI.
Who can race and is there anything else to do?
  Kids Race (Ages 6 to 12): Size of the outhouse must be 18" x 24" x 40" tall. Attach 12" push bars on each side for safety. Skis or toboggan allowed for runners. You must register by noon; race starts at 1:00 PM. Cash prices for 1st - 3rd Place
  Adult Race (2 age categories): Minimum size must be 3' x 4' x 6' tall on skis only! (Push bars, not to exceed 16", recommended.) Cash prices for 1st - 3rd Place
  Volleyball: Played on a snow field with orange lines painted on the snow.
Be creative and get judged on your workmanship, presentation, most humorous idea, miles most traveled and closest to theme ideas of your outhouse.

  OK. Enough advertising. Let's get down to my viewpoint of this event...
  Being the Curator of the Outhouses of America tour, I thought it only fitting that I make the pilgrimage up to Trenary this year to see what all the hoopla was about. I departed Detroit at 10:42 AM and arrived at the Mackinac Bridge at 4:15 PM. When I crossed the bridge, a Coast Guard icebreaker was making its way through the Straits opening up the shipping lanes. On the St. Ignace side of the bridge, I paid for the crossing and then I saw it: There right in front of me was a big electronic sign flashing "Outhouse Classic in Trenary this weekend".
  Along the way, my car with over 192,000 miles on it, began to miss and hesitate from time to time. Here I was in the U.P. with a possible engine problem. I pressed on and finally made it to the hotel in Escanaba. Along the way, I encountered 16 deer (total count for the entire weekend) and even saw one guy gutting a freshly killed deer in his driveway! I almost hit a deer on the way to Trenary the night I arrived. I was told later that many deer are out and about on that road. Total mileage to get there: 438 miles! I can't believe I drove 438 miles to see Outhouses Racing down Main Street on Skis.
  I arrived at the Trenary Tavern late Friday night and met up with Patty the Painter (she was the person who invited me to attend) and I met Rollie (an Outhouse Classic Committee member) and Cindy and Terry Pilon, owners of the Trenary Tavern. The Tavern was hopping with lots of people of all ages and we talked late into the night. At midnight, we heard a payloader outside. It was bringing the snow for the Outhouse Race Track and dumping it on Main Street. In a short time, all the snow necessary for the race was placed all down Main St. A snow bank on either side would help to keep the Outhouses on the track. The trophies for the race winners were on display in the bar and they were hand-made for the winners. The Outhouse Committee is chaired by Toivo Aho and I met him on Saturday. I have a picture or two of him above. He was very nice to talk to. I found out that this event is just like many other events; it is hard to find volunteers to be on the Outhouse Committee because it is hard work to organize it every year.
  On Saturday, I arrived in Trenary around noon and took many of the pictures you see on this page. During the races, I took video. There were people everywhere playing volleyball on the snow, drinking all kinds of beverages, walking down Main St. and talking amongst themselves. A local radio station was there and had speakers mounted to many poles and they announced the races.
  The first racers to head down the track were the kids. I think there were around 4 or 5 entries and they were really funny to watch. People were lining the track all the way from the start to the finish line and beyond. The kids race about 200-300 feet.
  Around 2 PM, the real action began. The adults push the outhouses 500 feet down Main St. and all kinds of strategies were used. Some pulled, some pushed, some had one pusher in the front on one side and at the back on the other side. The correct way to push the Outhouses is to have two people in the back, pushing, which is very hard to do. Just think about it; you have to run at top speed down a snow covered surface. How do you get traction? Some used spikes or golf shoes; others fell! One thing that kept happening was that the outhouses kept going off the track on one side or the other. I attributed that to uneven pushing.
  One thing I noticed was that as the outhouses were pushed by you, the ground actually felt like it was moving and you could hear a low rumbling noise from the weight of the outhouse on the skis. It was pretty neat. Anyway, the young adults raced first and then the older adults raced. My favorite outhouse was the Vati-Can. It was pushed by two Nuns who carried rulers. Earlier, as they walked through the crowd, they hit people at random with the rulers. Many people related that to their days in Catholic Schools. When the Nuns raced their outhouse, they pushed it rather slowly and were praying the entire time. Another outhouse which took everyone by surprise was the "White House" pushed by Monika Lewinsky and Linda Tripp. It was absolutely hilarious and Bill Clinton was inside it! After the races, I went to have a closer look and there was Monika complete with blue dress and white stains all over the front of the dress. It was a riot!
  The weather on Race Day was warm, foggy and we had a touch of rain, freezing rain, sleet and snow during the race. I ate my meals at a restaurant in Escanaba called Delonas and it had excellent home cooked meals. I'd recommend it to anyone. They also kept their parking lot sanded which was nice. I also had a Pasty at the Fire Hall in Trenary. They served home cooked items and Pasties are a specialty of Northern Michigan. They were excellent.
  So what will be on tap for next year? Only time will tell but if the weather is good, you just might find me there again!
  One last thing: I have told many people about the Outhouse Races in Trenary and I can't tell you how many times I heard the comment "Oh, I know someone from Trenary!".

What else can you see in the images shown? Many times a photo is worth a thousand words and I've only elaborated with a few so here is your chance to add some "color commentary" to my collection. If your addition is worthy, you will find the quote added on the Comments to the Curator page. You can use Email to respond.

Have you seen all the Outhouses yet?

Return to the Outhouse Tour by clicking HERE!

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The 6th Ever 1999 Annual Outhouse Races in Trenary, Michigan

The Outhouses That Received Awards

People's Choice - Hockeytown

Most Miles Traveled - Windy Shitty

Most Humorous - The Vati-Can

Best Workmanship - Operating Engineers

Best Presentation - Tasson Distributing

Best Use of Theme - Gibby Bar

Race Results and Times

Kids Category

1st Place - Seymours Porta-Potty: 12.75 Seconds

2nd Place - Purple Potty: 16.57 Seconds

3rd Place - Dickenshield Insurance: 17.53 Seconds

Adults Category

Ages 13 - 30

Ages 31 and Over

1st Place - Peoples State Bank: 20.19 Seconds

1st Place - Timber Products: 24.235 Seconds

2nd Place - Pats Corner Bar: 24.25 Seconds

2nd Place - Chums: 25.0 Seconds

3rd Place - Kurt's Place: 24.3 Seconds

3rd Place - Trenary Fire Dept.: 30.662 Seconds

There was controversy over 3rd place. People were claiming that the "Pushers" were under 31!

Best Workmanship Award

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Best Workmanship Award

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Best Workmanship Award

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People's Choice Award

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People's Choice Award

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Most Humorous Award

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Most Humorous Award

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Most Humorous Award

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Most Miles Traveled

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Most Miles Traveled

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1st Place Ages 13-30 in 20.19 Seconds

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1st Place Ages 13-30 in 20.19 Seconds

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1st Place Ages 13-30 in 20.19 Seconds

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1st Place Ages 13-30 in 20.19 Seconds

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3rd Place Ages 13-30 in 24.3 Seconds

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3rd Place Ages 13-30 in 24.3 Seconds

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1st Place Ages 31+ in 24.235 Seconds

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1st Place Ages 31+ in 24.235 Seconds

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3rd Place Ages 31+ in 30.662 Seconds

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1st Place - Kids 12.75 Seconds

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GOTTA GO!GOTTA GO!

TO THE 6TH EVER OUTHOUSE CLASSICONLY IN TRENARY, MICHIGAN!

Have you seen all the Outhouses yet?

The 6th Ever 1999 Annual Outhouse Races
in Trenary, Michigan

1st Place Ages 13-30 in
20.19 Seconds

1st Place Ages 13-30 in
20.19 Seconds

1st Place Ages 13-30 in
20.19 Seconds

1st Place Ages 13-30 in
20.19 Seconds

3rd Place Ages 13-30 in
24.3 Seconds

3rd Place Ages 13-30 in
24.3 Seconds

1st Place Ages 31+ in
24.235 Seconds

1st Place Ages 31+ in
24.235 Seconds

3rd Place Ages 31+ in
30.662 Seconds

1st Place - Kids
12.75 Seconds

GOTTA GO!
GOTTA GO!

TO THE 6TH EVER OUTHOUSE CLASSIC
ONLY IN TRENARY, MICHIGAN!